A Subversive Reader Guide to Ikea

So, last week I decided to head down to Logan to visit Ikea and to visit another library in my library tour. While there, I realised with my extensive hours of shopping there, I could write the definitive Subversive Reader Guide to Ikea*

Tip #1 – When dressing for Ikea, wear the baby

If you’re intending to visit Ikea accompanied only by a little one who cannot walk (or who cannot walk for long) you’ve got three options. 1. Bring a regular sized pram or stroller and accept that you won’t be able to buy very much. 2. Bring a pram the size of a small 4WD and accept that you won’t be able to fit it in some parts of the shop. 3. Wear your baby and have your hands free to push a trolly or whatever else you need.

I wasn’t the only one to feel this way – I saw three soft structured carriers and two other ring slings in the time I was there!

Tip #2 – Join the Ikea Family

The Ikea Family offers free tea and coffee Monday to Friday. That’s worth spending 5 minutes joining up at one of the numerous booths around the place. There’s also other deals and specials available

Tip #3 – Have a vague idea of what you’re going to Ikea for

Are you going to buy cushions or to buy furniture or just to look? Have a vague idea or who knows what you’ll come home with! Though, no matter how good your plan is, you’ll probably come home with something you didn’t go for (Unless you’re Mr Pilot. He once went to Ikea, selected and bought the furniture he wanted and got out in under an hour)

Tip #4 – Don’t join the opening rush

Since the cafe opens in Ikea before the shop itself, there’s lots of people hanging anxiously around the entrance. I’m not sure why, but some of them take on the opening like it’s the Boxing Day sales. I found that hanging back 15-30 minutes meant there were less people all peering at the same small spaces at the same time

Tip #5 – Stay for the food

By the time I made it around the upper floor of Ikea, Squirm was gearing up for a feed. So, I got myself some food (I recommend the mousse) and my free coffee and made my way to one of the quieter corners of the dining area. Squirm and I enjoyed a quiet feed and I enjoyed the free wi-fi!

So, what did I end up with? Cushions, lamps, toys, organising things and a few good ideas. An excellent day out πŸ™‚

My Ikea Haul

What are your tips for surviving Ikea or other big shops?

*Note this is not definitive. And I reserve the right to review this advice at all times. While eating cake. Also, I did not receive any kind of payment or good for these tips. I’m definitely not that big! Though if Ikea is interested . . . πŸ™‚



  1. I must say I haven’t braved the Ikea aisles with the twinlets in tow just yet. But I do like the idea of free tea/coffee and Wi-Fi. Gotta love Ikea!

  2. I love Ikea, and living in the country means that when I finally make it to a city store, I am on a mission! I love tip #4 lol there are people who actually wait for the doors to open? Ha!

    My tip is to bring food for little ones and allow them some time to play in the kids section. It’s better than any play area. oh, and if you plan on dropping your kids off at the actual Ikea playground? Be warned: you need their Immunisation History. Seriously :/

  3. I am in LOVE with Ikea … but, still scared of going more than twice a year. The best part? The meatballs. They make astoundingly wonderful meatballs, and anytime I know somebody going, I get them to bring me back a frozen kilo packet. Nothing artificial, and a great quick kid’s meal. My only other tip? Don’t take a man, unless he is more patient than mine.

  4. I love this post … I have to live vicariously through mainland bloggers for my IKEA fix. I went to IKEA with some friends, bought a whole bunch of things that “oh, I’ll just pack them in suitcase and pay extra for baggage excess if I have to …” only to find out that was, oh, about a $100 over. OOps.

  5. When we were last renovating we were hitting ikea every weekend. We got to the point where we new every shortcut through the shop and could be in and out (with hot dogs) in under an hour.

  6. I’ve only been once. I had horrendous morning sickness. I stormed the building for the one thing I came in for and stormed right out again before finding the closest bathroom to throw up in. Hoping for a better experience next time!

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